‘My father was a baker, but never wanted to share how to make bread’

With international Men’s Day just around the corner, Piotr Skoczylas serves us up a healthy slice of human connection alongside a coffee at sunrise

Piotr Skoczylas started selling coffee and home baked cookies at Penarth’s promenade at dawn to the growing number of cold water swimmers after lockdown. People found community in the swim, and a tricycle full of “coffee, cookies and conversation” was the perfect lynchpin to hold it together.  

Standing tall, covered head to toe in a blue quilted dry-robe to keep off the morning chill, Skoczylas unclasps the lid of his ornately painted yellow coffee box. He works in a steady, deliberate manner, giving him an air of reassured comfort and grace while serving filter coffee to the steady stream of cold water swimmers in need of some warmth.

Recalling the impact of lockdown back in 2020, he explains, “Seeing this loneliness, I related to it a lot, so it was a no brainer to go into a business that was going to address this and say, ‘No, together is better’.” So Skoczylas popped the kettle on, threw some cookie dough in the oven and got on his tricycle, cycling down to the seafront Wednesday to Sunday no matter the weather.

Family knots can be the hardest to untie

The 34-year-old reminisces on baking and his challenging relationship with his late father, something many men struggle with. “It’s funny, because my father was a baker, but he never really taught me how to be a baker, he never wanted to share how to make bread,” he said.

I’ve created this kind of barrier around myself, over the years disassociating from men and then most people

There is no doubt Skoczylas wanted a deeper connection with his dad, feeling every time he tried to be vulnerable with him, he just got pushed away. “I have been angry and pointing fingers,” he said, “but you see it was just his way. And if I can accept that then I’m just one big step closer to love.”

Skoczylas smiles and looks up with warmth, remembering how after he donated cells for his father’s treatment he received a text saying ‘Thanks for everything <3’. “With a love heart! He never said anything like this,” he said. “This was like him saying I love you. He did that because I shut up and just allowed him to be him.”

A taste of wisdom from the waves

Reaching out by looking in

As Skoczylas hands out his coffee, cookies and conversation he reflects further on how he can still struggle with male relationships, something that’s ever pressing as international mens day looms. “On the menu there is a free hug because some time ago I needed one and was scared to ask,” Skoczylas loves when men come to him and are open and vulnerable and give him a free hug. But he freely admits hugs from men are still slightly uncomfortable for him. As a tall and overweight child he was bullied, dreading the locker room and swimming pool. “I’ve created this kind of barrier around myself, over the years disassociating from men and then most people.”

“A hug from a man is quite an interesting experience,” he takes a contemplative pause before continuing, “it can feel like an eternity, but if you can be with the discomfort and lean into it, embracing another human being… that is a beautiful experience of connection.”

The Penarth local cracks a loving smile: “I’ve seen men cry here, or we just sit and have those deeper moments and that level of connection that I don’t experience anywhere else. They come here and feel better.”

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