Young people tell how their lives have changed after living in foster families
Young people grew up in foster care share their experiences of how living in new homes bring hope to their life to raise public awareness on fostering community.
“It changed my life from one that was very sad, withdrawn and filled with fear into something happy, loving and fulfilling,” said Eleanor, who grew up in foster care.
“Foster care although is one of the hardest things I’ve had to go through for various reasons, it’s been the most positive too. I’ve found a family I would never have had before this. I would be alone without my foster parents. I would be incredibly insecure, afraid. I don’t know how long I could have kept surviving,” she said.
Juliane Liebermann via Unsplash)
Moving into foster care can be a difficult transition for both the foster family and young people. It is particularly challenging for those who have experienced previous trauma moving from different foster families. Many fear doing anything wrong and the threat of being moved again.
Angel, who grew up in foster homes, said: “I didn’t feel like belonging to anywhere because I have been moved for so many times before so you automatically think ‘I am not going to be here for long, I am going to move again, I am going to be with somebody else again.”
Angel thinks that trust is a massive thing in foster care in general. Without trust with foster parents, it is hard to feel comfortable and safe in the family.
“It is difficult to develop that trust, but I am lucky with my foster mum that when I was fifteen that was something she wanted to build relationship on,” said Angel. “This forever family actually included me in family events, family decisions and even as simple things like taking food out of the cardboard by myself, which I didn’t feel comfortable to do in somebody’s house before.”
“This makes me feel like home and part of the family and not an outsider anymore. I feel like more a normal child and from their support through school, through relationships, friendship that definitely changed the way that I look.”
Though Eleanor is now happy to share her experience of care to the public, she used to fear telling others she lived with foster parents.
“Some people in the public will know more than others about the caring system,” said Kathleen Toner, director of The Fostering Network. “Some people will have many questions about why young people would have to be in care but don’t often apply real analysis and just assume that it has been young people’s fault,”
Set up by The Foster Care Network, the #WhyWeCare campaign aims to tell the world positive difference of foster care can make to young people’s lives and the need for over 8,600 new foster families to meet demand across the UK.
“Through the campaign, we hope to clear the misconceptions of the public towards fostering. From the young peoples’ stories, they will know the importance of foster families for young people in the care system,” said Kathleen.
Both Angel and Eleanor also believe that sharing their experiences about life in foster care is one of the most important things people in the system can do to create change. It has the power to improve the system itself and unite those going through the same obstacles.
“I definitely think that there needs to be more awareness raised within public, about the experience of being in care and how that can affect the child and then through to their adulthood,” says Angel. “Because at the end of the day, the trauma you experienced in the care system will affect you when you are an adult.”